Steroids

So I've been coughing since Halloween.
Seriously coughing.
Well, of course it would be serious if it's been
going on for over a month.
I called my doc and he prescribed a Z-pac.
Took it.
Still coughing.
I finally went to a pulmonologist - lung doc.
He took xrays, gave me breathing tests, listened here
there and everywhere.
Doesn't know what's wrong with me.
Prescribed Prednisone.
Prednisone is a steroid that is supposed to
prevent/constrict inflamation ie: clear up my
lungs that already look clear on the xray.
Whatever.
So I take it.
I've taken it before.
No problem.
2 weeks later.
Still coughing.
Prednisone for 2 more weeks.
Now I notice something.
I'm down.
So down.
Down
Down
Down
Sad
feel like crying for no reason
but the coughing is subsiding.
Why am I so down?
I'm happy that my mother is home.
I'm happy that it's Christmas.
I'm happy, right?
AREN'T I HAPPY???!!!!!!!
Why do I feel so sad when
I'M SO FREAKIN' HAPPY DAMNIT?
Oh, I'm also feeling hostile.
Hostile
angry
short fused
very hostile.
I almost yelled at a man in a parking lot
for taking two spots.
Dylan was like, "Mom, whoa."
BUT THE COUGHING IS SUBSIDING AND I'M
SO FREAKIN' HAPPY.....and hostile....
and I want to eat one whole wall of the house.
Ok, maybe 2 walls.
I drive to the store to buy a pint of Hagen Daaz
Chocolate Chocolate Chip ice cream to have for
dinner.
NO SHARING.
(that's where I almost yelled at the man in the parking lot)
So let's see....
I'M SO FREAKIN' SAD, HOSTILE AND HUNGRY.
What the hell is wrong with me.
Hello internet.
"Call Doctor immediately if you have any of these serious
side effects from taking Prednisone: SEVERE DEPRESSION.
yup, that's me.
Hello!!?????
I suffer from depression anyway (well managed I might say)
Why the hell would you give me this medicine that makes me
want to run over cats and dogs with my car??????
So I stop taking it.
Call the doc in the morning.
He says, "oh, yeah, you better stop taking that."
I need a new doctor.
And no, I didn't eat all the ice cream.
There's a spoonful and a half left for tonight.