Gangs

So my son

made plans to go to the beach with his friends.
This would be his second time at the ocean without parental supervision.
He's 15, but I still worry.
So I said:
"You know to only swim by the lifeguards, right?"

He said:
"Yes mom, we only swim between the red flags."

Me: "DYLAN!"

Him: "I'm kidding, we're careful, I promise."

Then I went into the gang portion of my talk:
"If you run into any gangs........"

Him: "Where do you think I'm going??!!!!"

Me: "If you run into any gangs, remo......

Him: "I know, 'remove myself from the situation'."

I said:
"Dylan, it's my job as a parent to make sure you're safe."

My son then went into a stand up routine equal to any comic out there:

"Mom, we will not see any gangs. I have never seen any gangs. We're
going to the beach - no gangs. What do you think they do......

"Ok, ok, Latin Kings, Latin Kings, quite down, listen up.
We're all meeting at Ricky's house and then heading to the beach.
(cheering).
Julio, come on, Julio, quite down, I'm talking.
Now remember, next week.....Dave and Busters!!!
(more cheering)
And the week after that, White Water Rafting.
That will be a 'no knife trip', guns only. Knives will
pop the rafts. Remember, only guns."

This is my child.
MY child.