If you read my previous post, you'll know that I don't care for Chinese food.
I'm being kind.....I hate it.
I know, the gall!
How is that possible??
Here is a little background for ya'.
My father is not an adventurous eater.
He's affectionately known as "Meat and Potatoes Bob"
The closest we ever came to eating Chinese food
while growing up was the occasional stir fry.
One summer a friend from camp invited me
out to dinner with her family for some" Jewish soul food".
I'm thinking matzoh, but we ended up at China Palace
ordering a Pu Pu Platter.
A Poo Poo Platter??
Poo Poo....on a platter??!!!
Oh. My. God.
These people tricked me!
They're going to force me to eat Poop!
ON A PLATTER!!!
How do I get out of here.
I'm trapped.
(yes folks, these were the thoughts going through my head)
Well, the when the poop arrived, I was fascinated and yes,
I ate the poop.
Not only did I eat the poop...I liked the poop.
On the platter.
I returned home that evening and tried to explain
the whole Poop on a Platter experience, knowing full well
that Meat and Potatoes Bob would have none of it.
No poop for Bob. Unless of course you're not feeling well, then it's ALL about poop for Bob.
Read this and you'll understand.
Anyway, yeah, no Chinese food in our house.
Fast forward to college.
Pizza, beer and chinese food, right?
I was introduced to fried rice, egg rolls, chop suey,
moo shoo this and that, chop sticks, fortune cookies!
I tried to explain the benefits of clumpy rice
to my family over Christmas vacation.
They would have none of it.
However, when I came down with the chicken pox that summer,
and was the sickest sad-sack you'd ever seen, Meat and Potatoes Bob actually walked into a Chinese take-out place
and brought me the one thing I said I would eat....
Won Ton soup and an egg roll.
This man really loved me.
Back to college... one morning after a particularly
rough night of college stuff (drinking), I was in the bathroom
praying to the porcelain God when my "thoughtful" roommate
decided to REHEAT SOME SUEY SOMETHING OR OTHER IN OUR MICROWAVE!
What was she thinking??!!!!
That was it.
I was DONE.
No more Chinese food for me.
NOW do you understand???!!!!
The end!
6 comments:
Any food with the word poo in it, neva. NEVA!
I am a meat and potatoes chick myself.
LOL, you had me cracking up. I guess I can understand the whole not liking chinese food if it brings up bad memories. My husband actually sort of made the same mistake. I was in the hospital after Just having my second daughter Jordan and I was allowed to eat whatever I wanted. And this hospital, let me tell you, had thee most AWESOME menu I've ever seen a hospital have. It was like ordering in a restaurant. They had just about EVERYTHING! Anyway, since I was able to eat whatever I wanted I kind of sneekingly made sure I ordered enough for both Jay and I to eat, so he didn't have to go out, and that night he had some of the chinese food...and then he went out and celebrated with his friends the birth of his new daughter. YUP! You guessed it, he had too much to drink and when he got home all that chinese food ended up on my living room floor. GROSS!!! Fortunately for me he still likes chinese food. :P
I understand completely. Every time I am pregnant several foods get put on the never to be eaten again list for the same reasons. Sad, really. :)
LOL...hilarious of course!!! Poor Poo Poo Platter .... LOL... I feel the same way about chicken on the bone...after being pregnant.
Once I threw up chow mein noodles. Pretty gross clean up, that's for sure!
Kerry...you are a funny, funny girl! I do enjoy me a pu pu platter from time to time!
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