Dear Crazy Lady at the New Over Priced Organic Gourmet Store,
Shut up!
Just shut up!
You are so loud!
NO ONE cares to hear you tell your two little kids
how great this store is....over and over and over again.
I get it, you're excited to have this new store in town.
I know that you used to have to travel miles to their other store.
You've told everyone you pass that you used to shop
in their other store and that this one is GREAT!
I get it, you're SO HAPPY!!!
And wow, I never knew anyone could be so EXCITED to find CHICKEN SAUSAGE!
Yes, we understand it's difficult to find.
Yes, we hear that it's delicious.
Yes, we now know you don't like the kind with the parsley.
WE ALL GET IT.
WE ALL HEAR YOU!
And what is the deal with the sushi???
You tell your kids how good it is, over and over.
You show it to them, "SEE?? SEE???"
Then you tell your 3 year old she can't have it.
Over and over and over again.
You ARGUE with her.
SHE'S THREE!
How do I know she's 3?
Because you said, "HONEY, A 3 YEAR OLD WON'T LIKE SUSHI."
Over and over and over again.
It takes 2 two argue. Just SHUT UP and move on!
I get it, you're reaaaaallllly into the whole organic thing.
Good for you.
I think you should wander your loud ass
into the toiletry section and
see if they make organic shaving cream,
because honey, you could really use a shave.
*(normally, I'd feel "bad" for a woman with a beard,
but this LOUD, ANNOYING lady with her organic beliefs
and parsley free chicken sausage put me over the edge.)
5 comments:
HAHA! This cracks me up :)
some people just feel the need to share their world with the rest of us. Like the guy that shared his music with me yesterday. His bass was so loud my teeth rattled and I couldn't hear my radio. Aren't those people so giving? they just have to share, and make our world so much nicer....
Ok ... can I say that I wake up in the morning looking forward to seeing the new entry in your blog. You are so funny ... you make me smile... Your writing starts me out in the morning with a great attitude... thanks for being such a great person.
By the way.... I just about spit out my OJ at this one and Brieanna is rolling on the floor laughing. hee hee hee.....
I like the fact that she was trying to reason with a 3 year old as to why they wouldn't like sushi. I'd have gotten on my phone and called someone and said, "You'd never believe this crazy lady in front of me!"
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